Trickle-Down Trepidation

When Does Penny Prudence Become Financial Anxiety?

"I use coupons now at the grocery store," says my friend Skye, who has three kids. "I have the kids help me match the coupons to the items, and check the receipt at the end to see how much we saved. It's kind of fun!" Sometimes they put the savings toward a family movie night, which, these days, means renting a discount DVD and making Boboli pizzas at home.

My friend Kendra is kind of brilliant. She got spend-smart by reading "most of the personal finance books in the library" and is already talking to her kids, ages 2 and 4, about money management.

"Financial responsibility isn't about not spending; it's about spending in accordance with your values," she says. "We don't say 'Kids, our grocery budget has changed so we're not eating meat tonight.' Instead we say, 'Hey, it's a new recipe. What do you think?' This lets them make up their own minds and not feel like money has to inform the pleasure they get from an experience."

As for anxiety? "Being direct and clear with our children about money — and what it's for — slays that dragon pretty effectively," she says. "Remember that money has no intrinsic value. It's just a tool we use to live our lives the way we want."

I figure the best way to save money and ensure my kids' fiscal foresight is to have them live with Kendra.

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